I guess I’m not used to someone, anyone, putting me first.

And maybe, I will never know how it feels.

Fat, emo, noisy, weirdo, loner, ugly, boring.

Anything else you might want to add to this slowly growing list of insults I get everyday? Does this really define who I am as a person? I mean, is this really so important that my other traits seem invisible to people? If so, wow. Whatever else is the purpose of living in this kind of society?

The hardest thing to do is to love when you don’t have the strength and motivation to even try.

Panahon na naman ng tag-ulan.

Ang lamig na ng simoy ng hangin. Nakakapanaas-balahibo ang ginaw. Heto na naman ako, nagtitiyaga sa pagyakap ng mga malambot na unan. Wala kasi akong kayakap na tunay. Sawi pa din sa pag-ibig. Haaaay.

Beneath all the skulls, and spikes, and death-rocker makeup is a girl who just wants to be seen, heard, loved, and paid attention to..

SO I’m reading Evermore and there’s this character named Haven. She was described by her friend, Ever, as like that on the title. Her parents seem to ignore her and that lack of love and care made her to be the goth that she is. She thinks that maybe, by standing out, she’ll find someone who’d appreciate her.

I think I can relate to her but not on the goth side. I may be a rebel. I wear dark clothes, paint my nails black listen to rock music, but then I just want to be recognized by my parents. All they could see is my awesome, pretty little sister. How pretty she is, how she could be a model in the future. But me? Nah, who cares about that chubby bookworm slash math geek. I get good grades I won medals during math competitions, but do they see me? No. I’m not good enough. They still prefer my cute little sister even if she barely passed her math and other subjects. Boohoo for me, but I guess that’s life.

Wag kang emo, di ka naman tarsier..

So I just recently learned that when tarsiers get depressed (or pag nagtampo sila), they starve themselves and bang their heads to the trees. Masochist right? Oh well, they’re that sensitive. So don’t harm yourselves when you’re sad or lonely. You are not a tarsier to do so.

If you give me the chance..

I will never make you cry, come on let’s try.

If would just let me in your freakin’ heart, maybe you’d see how much I care for you. But that’s the problem isn’t it? You won’t. You’re so blinded by the way you feel for her. You never did see how much I’m trying to love you. You will never appreciate the things I did for you. For three years, I was with you. I’m there whenever you needed me. But what? For all those years, you only saw me as your friend and nothing more. Do you know how hard that is for me?