I have successfully convinced another friend of mine to start watching Doctor Who. Although it took him two episodes to get into it, I am so delighted! This is my 3rd triumphant recruit to the Doctor Who fandom. My Whovian heart is crying happy tears.

They say that first love never dies, that the flashbacks will haunt you forever. But I guess it’s not the sweet memories you’ve had with the person that actually lingers. I think it’s the fact that this person was the one who made that first crack in your perfectly healthy, undamaged heart.

Post Delena feelings.

I just watched the latest episode of The Vampire Diaries. As usual, my heart ached for Damon when he told Elena the reasons why Stefan ruined the plan. I don’t know why but I really get so attached with Damon’s character. It’s not really that he’s very much gorgeous. It’s more about the fact that he is in love with a girl that he will never get. Yes, he fights for her affection but I think that, at the back of his mind, he knows that he wouldn’t have the chance against his brother. He already understand that Elena is in love with his brother. That no matter how close he got with her, it will never be enough for Elena to see him, to love him that way. 

I guess maybe I felt the same way too. I was in love. I can’t get the person to love me back because he is in love with someone else. But like Damon, I find it difficult to ignore those feeling I’ve had. I understand the suffering and the pain. I get how hard it is to hold back all the emotions even if it’s not right. It hurts to just walk away because you know that it will never be, that it was never for you.

You see, loving someone is not easy. When you love, you don’t just sleep for a night and forget everything you felt. You can’t just wish those emotions away. You will forever have that special place in your heart for the person you never had. You will always carry them in your heart like a bomb, ready to explode once you light it up with just a little memory. 

HP and HG confession.

When the last Harry Potter film was released last July, I got a bit depressed for I don’t know what else to look forward to next year. The book and movie series that I’ve been attached to for half of my life has finally come to an end and it left me hanging. Thankfully, my second most favorite series made it into the world of movie franchise. If not for the Hunger Games, I wouldn’t know what to expect and hope for next year. I guess it somehow made my inner bookworm heart beat once more. It may not be as good and successful as the Harry Potter phenomenon but at least, it’s something to wait for. 

L. O. V. E. ?

At this point in my life, I’m wondering whether I want to be in a relationship because I want to experience love or because I am too engrossed with the idea of being in love. I don’t know if I really want to be involved with someone in an intimate way. Maybe it’s just because my mind is so full of romantic stories from what I have watched in movies or from what I’ve read in books and novels. I have only been in one serious relationship before and that was a long time ago, when I was still in high school. I get times when I want to get close to someone. But then I don’t know if it’s really enough to consider it as a start of a relationship or I just long and crave for company because I’m lonely. When I see couples, I do tend to wonder when I’ll find myself a guy who would be there for me. I’m so confused. Is it really because I want to fall in love again, or is it because I am pressured by what I see around me? Maybe I’m just infatuated with the thought of being loved and all that crap I hear about it. I don’t know. I really don’t know.

Go to sleep with a weary heart, wake up with a tarnished soul.

I’m gonna paint you by numbers
And color you in
If things go right we can frame it
And put you on a wall
And it’s so hard to say it
But I’ve been here before
Now I’ll surrender up my heart
And swap it for yours

My heart flutters every time our eyes meet. You make me feel giddy all over.