There’s barely a week left before the holiday I dread the most.

Soon, there’d be lovey-dovey couples proclaiming and showing off their affection in public places.

Also, almost all of my friends have boyfriends and girlfriends and they’d probably go out. So as always, I’ll be left out hiding in my place to avoid all the fuss.

And I don’t know what’s worse: being stuck alone inside my dorm or having to endure being a third wheel when my friends invite me to go with them.

Ugh. I hate this holiday so much. It’s so freaking insensitive to those of us who are single.

During normal days, I don’t find being single as a problem. But times like this can make any strong and independent single person a miserable mess like no other.

But then again, maybe I’m the only one like this.

Why am I so unlikable?

Am I actually the only one who dislikes the whole premise of Warm Bodies, both the book and the movie?

I’m sorry if I like my zombies better when they’re brain-hungry and crazy. You know, like the ones in The Walking Dead.

I mean, why do you have to force everything into the romance genre?

Of make-believe princes and damsels-in-distress.

At a very young age, we were subjected to believe that love is a thing that everyone has a privilege to have. For girls, we were read fairytales and the image of a perfect prince riding on a white horse is imprinted on our minds. We were forced to believe that someday soon, our prince, too, will come. This prince will sweep us off our feet and take us away to his castle, to live that ever cherished happy ever after—a basic childhood fantasy. And so for a while, we hope and wait, believing that all of us have their destined person and that he exists as our soul mates, our missing half.

For boys, as a child, they used to live in a pretend world of strong and might superheroes and powerful kings, with the thought of being the one to protect people and save damsels-in-distress. They are exposed to playing roles of dominance and glory. To some, prestige and honor becomes higher up in their priorities than a life of commitment, passion and love. Some other would believe that girls are just trophies for all the wars they have won. Some would grow into men who would treat girls like weaklings, trying to do everything on their own. And to a select few, girls would be like precious gems, very laborious to even reach. Nevertheless, there would always be a pre-existing notion of what love is supposed to be.

And then we grow up, we live our lives and for the first time, uncover pieces of the truth. With each year, we unmask the harsh reality that sometimes, love isn’t available for all. Yes, there lucky ones who find their persons and live their childhood fairytales together.But for others, true love became absurd, an impossible thing to come by. We find ourselves in destructive relationships that make our past faith in the love to crumble into dust. Some find themselves completely alone, all hopes of a prince to come thrown away into nothingness. So I guess what I am trying to say here is that expectations, no matter how little they are, would always render us pained and hopeless when a contradicting reality sets in.

You don’t have to force yourself to fit into any crowd. Sometimes, it’s better to be alone yet at peace and honest with your own mind than forever be imprisoned miserably in a pretentious life just so you can be accepted by everyone else.

For sale: Baby shoes. Never worn.

“Ernest Hemingway once won a bet by crafting a six-word short story, that can make people cry. Here it is.”

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The magical power of words is amazing. And this is one of the best evidences of how writing can move us in unexpected ways. Even with only six words arranged in a simple manner, Hemingway was able to tear through readers’ hearts and manage to unleash such strong and drastic emotions. 

You might say that I am overreacting seeing as I haven’t yet experienced the heart-wrenching grief of a mother who lost a child. Nevertheless, these words still struck me with as much same intensity. I really admire people who have this talent of crafting and stringing together words that would make such great impact on every person. 

Help me break away

From my mind’s unyielding grasp 

And it’s blaring scream..

Unpopular Opinion: I despise book-to-movie adaptations.

The Perks of Being A Wallflower movie is coming out soon and now people are clamoring to get their copies of the book so that they can be part of the fandom. And you know what I think? “Ugh, not again.” Ever since the production for the movie started, a lot of people became suddenly interested with the book. I don’t know if it’s because the movie stars Logan Lerman and Emma Watson or they really are interested in the book, but nonetheless, from what I can remember, there weren’t this much people who gave a rat’s ass on this book before. I even had a hard time looking for a copy and had to order mine. Now the books are just displayed out there in every bookstore I know.

Although most book lovers I know are crazed when their favorite literary pieces come to life in movies, I can’t help but feel irritated about it. I know page-to-screen adaptation is very helpful in terms of promotional aspects for the books, but then when you come to think of it, somehow, the reason behind wanting to read these books becomes a bit more superficial.

First of all, I hate the fact that some people just buy and read the books for the sake of being “in”. I know a lot of people from my school who bought The Hunger Games trilogy when the movie came out. Well, it’s not a bad thing to want to know more about the story, but what’s bothering me is that they use the books as some fashion statement of sorts, bringing them wherever or taking pictures with captions saying how much they love the series, when in fact, they haven’t even touch a single book before that. Maybe I am being selfish or what, but I feel that the value of these precious books decreases as they are regarded as a fad or a trend.

Second, I also notice that some people prefer the characters who were portrayed by “beautiful” actors in their movie counterparts. I can say this much is true with Never Let Me Go, with Andrew Garfield playing the role of Tommy. And who can forget the obsessed moms who swooned crazily over Edward Cullen played by Robert Pattinson? No matter how bad the books are, people bought it for the sake of proving how much a fan they are of their books, without actually reading deeper and understanding the stories.

Third is that some people don’t even bother reading the books because watching the movie is much easier. And that makes me angry because I think it’s unfair for the authors how people neglect the original plot and are contented with what’s in the film. Even the Harry Potter films are nothing compared to the books. I for one, is a huge fan and was so disappointed when my favorite parts from the book were cut from the movie. Book-to-movie adaptations makes people lazier. Plus, there are some who claim to be total fans without even opening the book version of the movies they so dearly love. I have this friend who was so deeply moved by the ending My Sister’s Keeper and yet she was so surprised and upset when I told her that it was different and the exact opposite what happened the one in the book.

Lastly, also the top reason I hate book-to-movie adaptations, is that these films ruin the freedom that their book counterparts give me. Without the movie, my mind is free to imagine how the characters and settings look. I can picture every single detail as described in the authors’ words the way I want them to appear in my head. But with the movies casting the roles of my favorite characters into various different artists, I feel that my imagination was caged into a box I couldn’t escape. Suddenly, whenever I read the books again, all I could see are the faces of the actors who portrayed them. Peeta is Josh Hutcherson who isn’t actually blond and fit the description for Peeta. Percy is Logan Lerman even if Percy is supposed to be a 12-year old kid. I cannot break the connection and with that, I feel frustrated because for me, the purpose of these books is to let my mind wander off into distant places, depending on how I understand them. And what these movies do is to rob me off that privilege and leave me stuck with what they have set for their viewers.

I hate suspension of classes.

On contrary to the desires of most students, I really don’t like it when classes are cancelled due to bad weather or whatever else. I know that it seems a bit insesitive for those who commute, I get that. But this is not about the consequences of going to school in such increment weather. This post is all about what I think is the consequence of missing a day’s worth of class.

Yes, it’s nice to take a break but then after that, everything just piles up. The quizzes are doubled, make-up classes are held, the lectures are rushed, the deadlines for reports are moved and the whole schedule is affected. I may be weird but I just find it more difficult to adjust with these changes. To me, it seems that the workload increases when classes are suspended. Plus, I feel like my efforts in studying and preparing for the following day are put to waste.  Call me geeky or whatever, but I really prefer going to school as planned.

Damn, I hope there are classes tomorrow.

It used to feel like dreaming, except I did wake up.

It’s been almost four years now. I could still remember the way you smile. I can still picture the twinkle in your eye whenever I tell you how much you mean to me. Your laughter is a ghost that constantly haunts me. I miss the talking, the nonsensical chats, the secrets exchanged. I miss how you can remember every detail of the stories I shared. I miss how you can sense my mood even without me talking. I miss your arms around me. I miss everything that we’ve lost.

No matter how much I try to squeeze your very existence into this teensy tiny box and shove into the deepest corners of my head, the memory of you gets out, piece by piece like a stubborn little kid who wouldn’t stop playing. At times, I delude myself into thinking that I have successfully wiped you clean from my brain. But then I would hear this one song, and then the moments we shared would just flash in front of my eyes like a glimpse of recorded videos. And then I would become all miserable knowing that I failed, yet again.

I guess it’s because you were my first in everything. You were the first one who have reached into my very core, in the deepest, most personal way. You were the first person I learned to depend on without any doubts. You became my confidant, the one I fully trust. I grew so attached. You were more than just a boyfriend. You took parts of me and I took some of yours. As cliché and corny as it may sound, you were my puzzle piece.

And when all of it ended, you took that one important piece which, up until now, is a gap that I can’t seem to fill. Yes, we might me “friends” right now, but every time I see you and spend time with you, I can’t help but imagine how it would be like if it worked out between us. Whenever we talk and laugh at past jokes and memories, my mind wanders to an alternate universe where the puzzle is still complete, intact. 

Leave me alone with these surging emotions

A captive of my head’s boisterous thoughts

Let me bask inside this deranged mind

A slave to my own uncertainties and insecurities..

Why does school starts in June here in the Philippines?

I mean, I get it that they reserve the summer season of April and May for vacation but I just think that the month of June isn’t very conducive for studying. For the benefit of those who aren’t from the Philippines, June is considered as the month of bad weather. It is in this month we start to experience a lot of rainstorms and flood.

So imagine how difficult it is for the students to get on with their classes when the weather is all cold and wet. How do you expect us to stay up and concentrate with our lessons when the climate forces us to cozy up and stay indoors? Of course we cannot just stay out of school every time that it rains but when it’s this heavy, do you think it’s appropriate to send students to school? When it’s pouring and chilly and windy outside, our body’s natural instinct would be to just stay as warm as possible. It is also inevitable that we would feel all sleepy and lazy. I know it’s not an excuse for not studying well but it is true.

So yeah, I just think that it’s better for classes to resume in other months instead of June. I think it would make students more productive and it would lessen the hassle. And uhm yeah, because I still don’t want to go back to school on Tuesday.